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My dad is a World War II vet. He signed up when he was 17 and worked the railroad. He told us a few stories when we were growing up, but he really started sharing his experiences after my daughter interviewed him for a high school class project. He hasn’t stopped. A few years back we arranged to have him interviewed for the National Archives Veteran’s History Project. Now we have a treasured CD with his voice telling his stories.

When I listen to the CD, I hear a few hints of his now very obvious memory loss. His stories morph with each re-telling. A few months ago I would say Don’t you mean … Wasn’t that …. Now I just listen to the new version and enjoy him reveling in the storytelling.  

While I experience the ongoing grief that accompanies loving a person with memory loss, my dad experiences his own grief. He’s very aware of his decline. Getting old is hell. We usually think of a loss as the death of a person, but there are many losses that can be experienced by a person with a chronic or terminal illness.  In addition to cognitive loss, there is the loss of physical ability, energy, hope, meaning and purpose.

One positive is that my dad finds meaning in the telling of his stories. A positive for me is the gift of time we get to spend together - as trying as it can be at times. The other truly amazing gift is the CD that I cherish and will be able to share with my grandchildren who will get to hear great-grandpa’s voice sharing stories of the Great War.

If your WWII vet is still alive, consider getting his or her story recorded, either on paper or digitally.  Let your veteran tell the story in his or her own way. Go to the Library of Congress Veterans History Project for more ideas http://www.loc.gov/vets/vets-home.html

Here are a few suggested topics taken from the history project.  Always begin by thanking your veteran for their service.

1.  A Few Biographical Details

• Where and when veteran was born.
• Family details: parents’ occupations, number and gender of siblings.
• What veteran was doing before entering the service.

2. Early Days of Service

• How veteran entered service—draft or enlistment.
• If enlistment, why and the reason for choosing a specific branch of service.
• Departure for training camp, early days of training.

3. Wartime Service

• Where veteran served.
• Action witnessed, or duties away from the front line.
• If applicable, emotions relating to combat—witnessing casualties, destruction.

4. War’s End, Coming Home

• Where veteran was when war ended.
• Reception by family and community.

5. Reflections

• How wartime experiences affected veteran’s life.
• Life lessons learned from military service.

Embrace the moment.

Additional Resources:

For access to a new publication entitled “The American Veterans and Service members Survival Guide:  How to Cut through the Bureaucracy and Get What You Need – and Are Entitled To”, go to:  http://www.veteransforamerica.org/survival-guide/survival-guide-download/ published by Veterans for America.

For more information and links to the VA regional offices, go to:  http://www1.va.gov/directory/guide/home.asp?isFlash=0.

Diane Snyder Cowan is the mother of two grown daughters and a national leader in using music in grief therapy, as well as the director of Elisabeth Severance Prentiss Bereavement Center of Hospice of the Western Reserve in Cleveland, Ohio.   She is a regular ShareWIK.com columnist. To learn more about Diane, visit her blog.

Read other Diane Snyder Cowan columns here. 

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