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What if…a miracle occurred and at the end of this holiday season, you didn’t feel compelled by the overeating you did to make yet another New Year’s resolution to lose weight that you know you won’t keep?

What if… you could enjoy going to all the festivities without fearing food?

The holiday season can be a particularly stressful time for people who struggle with food, their bodies, and their weights.  The pressure is on to party and be merry.  Delicious food is everywhere with endless opportunities to overeat and over drink, generally, leaving you entering the New Year feeling bad about yourself and desperate to lose weight. There are no shortage of stressors this time of year.

How about trying on some new behavior and some new strategies?

Working with people for 30 years who have weight and body image issues, I have discovered the following 10 tips to be helpful in order to thrive, not just survive through the holidays:

1. Approach holiday events that may be stressful by using this guiding principle:

What things can I control? What things can’t I control? What things do I have to adapt to? 

By asking these questions, you will feel more prepared to deal with the very things that have driven you to eat emotionally in the past and pack on those unwanted pounds-the comments from your critical mother, seeing your old boyfriend at a party, or being at a work event having to be around your boss with whom you have ongoing conflicts.

2. Anticipate and plan ahead-anticipate troublesome situations that might bring up feelings that can lead you into emotional eating and make an action plan as to how you will handle them. When you have a plan, you feel more in control.

3. Know your triggers-that is, the events, people, and circumstances that activate your desire for food when you’re not physically hungry like the comments from your critical mother, seeing your old boyfriend at a party, or being at a work event having to be around your boss with whom you have ongoing conflicts.

4. Attend to your true, physical hunger-don’t go to a party, family dinner, or any other gathering feeling too hungry.  That will set you up to overeat- have a high protein snack like low fat cheese and a piece of fruit or whole grain crackers, a protein bar, etc

5. Whenever possible at a party or event, put food on a plate-especially appetizers, passed hors d’oevres, & desserts so you can maintain an awareness of what & how much you’re eating.

6. Don’t deprive yourself -deprivation will lead you to overeat on the  foods you tell yourself are “forbidden.”  If you truly want something, have a “reasonable” serving, eat slowly and enjoy!

7. Practice the Buffet Technique-this can be used in any event where there is a wide variety of food which can feel overwhelming. Simply look at all the food available, walk away into another room and think about what you really want. By nature, we are very visual people and our hunger can easily be cued in by the sight of the food. Walking away can give you a moment to clear your mind of the food cues and enable you to think about what your really want.  Then go back, make a plate of food and eat it slowly and mindfully.

8. Drink consciously-drinking excessively during holiday functions can stimulate your appetite and will likely lead to overeating, not to mention, cloud your awareness of your behavior.

9. Use your mouth to empower yourself- instead of stuffing your feelings down with food, identify your feelings and if you find you are upset about something, assert yourself with family, friends, co-workers. Communicate your emotions and you won’t feel compelled to eat them away.

10. Be your own Inner Coach- turn off the negative, critical, judgmental self talk and replace it with positive, encouraging, supportive messages to get yourself through holiday challenges. Positive self talk can help you to adapt to situations that are not in your control.  Remember, it is our feelings and thoughts that drive our actions. You have the choice: to listen to your physical hunger or eat emotionally. You are in the drivers seat, not food.

Why not give yourself the gift of trying on some new behaviors this holiday season.  Ring in the New Year with a new attitude toward food and your body!

Allyn St. Lifer has been a therapist in private practice for over 30 years and specializes in teaching clients mindful eating to determine physical hunger and the point of satisfaction.  She is the founder and director of Slimworks, a mind/body, non-diet approach for managing weight and transforming one’s relationship with food, body and self.  To find out more about Allyn, please visit her website: www.slimworks.com.  She is a regular ShareWIK.com columnist. 

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